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Who Comes First? How to Choose the Right Ancestor to Start Your Family Tree
- Devon Noel Lee
- May 27
- 4 min read
A viewer named Trish recently asked a great question: “Which ancestor should you start with when beginning a family history?”
If you’ve ever opened your genealogy software and stared at the empty branches of your tree wondering where to begin, you’re not alone. Trish mentioned that her earliest ancestors were born in Ireland in the late 1700s or early 1800s, and she has very little information—sometimes just a name. That’s a tough starting point for anyone!
The good news? You don’t have to begin with your earliest ancestors.
Start Your Family Tree With Yourself—Yes, Really
When it comes to researching your family tree, the best place to start isn’t generations back—it’s with you.
It may sound a bit self-centered, but trust me: you are the cornerstone of your family tree. Start by gathering your own documents—birth certificates, school records, photos, awards, anything that tells your story. Organize what you already have, and make note of what’s missing.
Then, move on to your parents. If you’re adopted or estranged from biological family members, include the people who raised you—step-parents, foster families, grandparents, aunts, or uncles. They are part of your story, too.
Once you've built a solid foundation of well-documented relationships, move outward. For each person, aim to back up the family stories with records. Just because someone remembers Aunt June’s birthdate doesn’t mean it’s correct—see if you can find a document that proves it.
And when you hit a dead end on one branch? Switch to another.
Research what’s available, and don't forget to include siblings, cousins, aunts, and uncles. They can provide valuable clues that help you circle back to that tough ancestor later.
If You're Writing Family History, the Starting Point Changes
Now, if your goal is to write your family history, the answer to “Where do I start?” depends on what you want to create.
Think of it like picking a music genre—it depends on your mood, your preferences, and your goals. Here's how to choose:
1. What’s the Scope of Your Project?
Are you writing a sweeping, multi-generational family book? A deep biography of one ancestor? A themed collection like "The Veterans in My Family"?
Your scope will help you decide where to begin. Here are a few examples:
Multi-generational book: Start with one ancestor and trace all their descendants, or start with yourself and work backward.
Themed book: Choose a topic—like military service—and write stories about each ancestor who fits that theme.
Biography: Pick one ancestor and go deep into their story.
You can organize your writing chronologically, by surname, or even from shortest to most compelling stories—it’s your book!
2. What’s Your Writing Experience?
If you're brand new to writing, start with someone you knew personally. You’ll have memories and maybe even photos or letters that will make the process easier. I actually don’t recommend writing about yourself for your first big project—it's surprisingly tricky!
If you already have writing experience (whether it’s journalism, blogging, or academic writing), feel free to tackle someone you find intriguing—even if their story is light on records. Just be aware that it may take more creativity and historical context to bring their story to life.
3. How Deep Do You Want to Go?
You can write light biographical sketches or create detailed narratives rich with family and historical context.
Sketches: Short profiles or summaries of a person's life. Great for beginners or large family projects.
Deep dives: Full narratives about someone’s life, including their relationships, culture, and world events that shaped their choices.
For your first attempt, I recommend starting with someone you know well or have researched thoroughly. Yes, it’s possible to write about someone with little documentation (I even do writing challenges like that on my YouTube channel), but it’s much harder without a strong foundation.
What’s Your Next Step in Researching Your Family Tree?
At the end of the day, where you start depends on your goal: Are you doing research or writing a story?
For research: Start with yourself and build outward, one document at a time.
For writing: Choose a scope, match it to your experience, and decide how deep you want to go.
And don’t worry if it still feels a little unclear. I’d love to help you figure out where to begin based on your specific project. Leave a comment below, and tell me what you’re working on!
While you’re here, be sure to check out my Write Your Family History YouTube channel for more writing tips. And stay on this channel if you’re looking for research strategies, tools, and family history inspiration.
Got a burning question about your ancestors? Drop it in the comments for my Viewer Mailbag series. Whether it’s a mystery that’s stumped you for years or just something small you’re curious about, I’d love to help.
Let’s bring your family’s story to life—one person, one record, and one story at a time.
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